Flirting in Germany – The art of seducing German Women

You are new to Germany? You are feeling a bit lost here? Still don’t speak the language but are interested in German girls? Flirt Fever helps you!

Flirting in Germany is pretty similar to most other western countries – and yet there are differences. To those who are new to Germany, whether you are a tourist or an expat: Don’t be afraid! It doesn’t matter if you just want to have an interesting conversation with the beautiful girl you saw in the bar or if you are looking for serious love. Flirt Fever supplies you with the tricks you need.

Same but yet different

Flirting is different in nearly every country. The key to success is to know the mannerisms of each one. While especially in the countries of southern Europe flirting seems to be something natural and completely uncomplicated, coquetting in Germany seems to be quite more serious. While men in other countries act according to the motto: ‘she needs to know what I want, so she can react’, German flirts are often more careful.

Coquetry in Germany is mainly

  • reserved
  • stiff
  • subtle

Many people in Germany feel unsecure while flirting and the success of the quest usually fails because of the three M’s:

  • misunderstanding
  • missing
  • misinterpreting

Trying to have a lightweight flirt with a German girl, you can either be too shy – and your attempt might be misunderstood as just chatter or even completely missed. Or you are too direct, which can be misinterpreted as being rude or too aggressive.

What you have to understand when trying to flirt with German girls is that they are conditioned to a very subtle way of flirting. Just passing over and saying ‘hi’ frightens many, because they are just not used to this direct way. They are outside of their comfort zone, which often leads to uncomfortable silence and a heavy crack in the man’s self-esteem.

Another thing typical for German flirts is that they are taken very seriously.  They often have much more meaning than in other countries. That means on the one hand that they are often less fun. You have to be careful what you are saying, because just being nice can quickly be misunderstood as a serious offer and lead to disappointment.

For this reason, many Germans feel unsecure while flirting. It often has a negative connotation rather than being seen a beautiful activity. On the other hand a lot of wonderful surprises may await you, when doing it right. Who knows, maybe your next German flirt may bring you the love of your life?

The key to success in german flirts

First of all: There is no definite key to success. Because you are unique and your potential quarry is unique, as well. But there are some hints that will definitely help you.

  • First of all: Remember what it is all about: Giving you and your chosen one positive feelings. Don’t take it too serious but don’t give her the feeling to be just one of many. Value her and give her appreciation – for her look or her shining characteristics.
  • Don’t start too aggressive. Often a good way is to start by looking at her – with an interested but not too fixed gaze. If she returns it: Smile. If she smiles back: Go for her!
  • Finding the right intro: To avoid misunderstandings, start with clearly showing your intention without frightening her. You could say something like: ‘You have a really interesting smile. I would love to get to know the woman behind it.’ At the last part of this article, we will tell you how to say this and similar phrases in German.

Let’s imagine the best case: Your talk has been successful and she says yes to a date. And then? You can be relaxed: The ‘rules’ for dating in Germany are not very different to the ones in most other western countries. Still there are a few characteristics:

  • Paying the bill. While in other countries it is natural for the man to pick up the bill, it is not in Germany! Germans can be ruthless when it comes to paying the bill – it can happen to you that the girl picks it up, if you are not fast enough. So if you want to be a gentleman: Better go to the washing room after you have paid!
  • Chitter Chatter. Germans are not really into chitter chatter. Talking about the weather or the restaurant decoration can quickly quench them. Instead of small talk, they really like serious conversations. Do not be afraid of debating or telling your opinion. This makes you interesting – but make sure to have some secure arguments!
  • Finding the right location. Taking her to a restaurant or a cinema is never wrong. But German girls like adventures. So why not surprise her with a special date? Go outdoors, live adventures, have fun! Show her that you are not as boring as German men are said to be (which of course is not the whole truth….).

Finding the right words in a flirt

Nearly every German girl speaks English. Still, if you really want to impress her and show your serious interest, it is a good idea to know at least a few phrases in German. Flirt Fever shows you some important ones (image gallery):

  • Lächeln
    You have a beautiful smile. I would really love to get to know the woman behind it.

What is your favorite phrase? Do you already have intercultural flirting experiences?

Let us know in the comments! Flirt Fever wishes you good luck with your next (German) flirt!

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